- "I'm the leading man(?)."
- —Balthier about himself(?).
- "It's the eating van."
- —Balthier about Oscar Moyer van.
- "It's the shitting can."
- —Balthier about bathrooms.
- —Women after Balthier raises an eyebrow.
Balthier is the son(?) of Ciddy-fuss Doberman Bunny-ah-sa and a she-goat.
Balthier is a self proclaimed leading man(?). Most women (and most men) find him suave, brave, smart, manly, badass, funny and other such things. Realistically, he(?)'s not as suave as James Bond, not as brave as Link, not as smart as a five-year old, not as manly as John Wayne, not as badass as Clint Eastwood and not other such as... that guy. He is a thing, however.